Worship Him in Humbleness.

This last week at Calvary we had our annual seven days of fasting and prayer. To be honest, going into this week, I was not excited. I was ready to sit this one out, and I had every excuse ready for doing so. But God had other plans and He actually had me fast for the entire seven days. I had never fasted for seven days before and my past experiences with fasting last year and the year before were really hard, but God met me in such an incredible way this week and He gave me so much strength, energy and joy!

The first day of the fast was funny because that morning at church there was a lot of talk about how this fast was going to be about humbling ourselves, and my first thought was, "no... I don't think that's what God has for me this week.."

Hmmmm..... one sign that you need to be humbled: thinking that you don't.

I went into last week with a couple of things on my heart that I wanted God to hear and answer but a word that was spoken over this fast was: God you always hear me. Help me hear you.

God spoke to my heart this week about striving. Striving in our Christianity without really even knowing we're doing it. Confession: I am a striver! Sometimes I feel my heart is right behind it because I want to know the Lord so much, but God helped me recognize that there is a difference between being steadfast and striving. He spoke to me that He is God and I am man so I should let my words be few (Ecclesiastes 5:2). I shouldn't come into His presence with an agenda because He is Holy! I'd been bypassing the peace of God, He told me to just enjoy Him.

He brought to mind the story of Mary and Martha at the beginning of the week and I didn't think too much of it until I realized what He was saying. It's funny how the very things we are striving for God is so willing to give us if we humble ourselves. I so long to be Mary in this story, there is such beauty in the passion she poured out at Christ's feet. So I strove to be like her. But God gently reminded me that Mary didn't strive to be passionate, it overflowed from a place of peace and intimacy with God.

This week was so different than how I expected it to be. I expected a big epiphany, one big giant move from God. Instead God quietly spoke and worked and sustained. I started this week feeling like something was holding me back from being able to fully enter into God's presence, God humbled me and filled me afresh with his Spirit. He reignited my passion for Him. I feel joyful, new, and free. This is SO long, I'm sorry, and I still feel like I can't really put words to what God has done this week.

Here is the verse I feel on my heart walking away from this week:

"He brought me out into a spacious place; he rescued me because he delighted in me." Psalm 18:19



Flashback! So this song played this morning and it brought me back to the good old days, Aquire the Fire in junior high. Plus it's beautiful, so I thought I'd share. :)